Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Chapter: Anxious Aspirations


We lose sight of what we have when we doubt it. We think it'll always be there, same story over and over again. Then it's really gone. Then what? We move on? Moving on is climbing over a colossal boulder threaded in roses. Each time we reach, we get pricked. I'd rather stay on this side, then become numb by all the pain I'd go through to climb over. It hurts either way, but isn't there pleasure on the other side of pain. But at this point feeling nothing sounds better than anything to you. I do not understand the things that happen, I cannot interpret them. Being lost leaves me with anxiety. I am anxious to know the truth. What is happening God, what is this?
Posted by Marlene Marmalade at 4:42 PM
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4 comments:

  1. AnonymousNovember 9, 2010 at 5:07 PM

    You need to believe, isn't faith blind? Forgive and move on. Aren't those the words of the book? You can not get mad at the thorns when you put them there.

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  2. Marlene MarmaladeNovember 9, 2010 at 5:15 PM

    Touché, though it's easier said than done, when the faith was broken many times, mutually. It's like I lost sight of what truth really is, and I just don't believe anything. What do I do then, when I continually ruin things for myself in trying to find an answer? Things seems seem to always be too good to be true, so ironic I actually thought that this morning.

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  3. AnonymousNovember 9, 2010 at 5:17 PM

    If things are too good to be true let them be, why would you ruin paradise? you gun' go to heaven and tell him to send you to hell?

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  4. Marlene MarmaladeNovember 9, 2010 at 5:21 PM

    I don't ruin things, things come to my attention. I don't intend on ruining it. I just don't want to be a fool living in paradise, get me? It's the doubt that creeps in and taints my image, but you have a point. I'll go to Heaven because I have faith He knows what He's doing, and I'm just going to let it play out. I know I'm not doing anything wrong, if anything, it's bringing me closer to Him. He's all I got in the end anyway.

    Thanks btw..

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