Chapter: Silent Screams

Who do I call when I get a good grade? Who do I call when my dog does something funny? Who do I call to talk to about my day and all the craziness I come across on the train? Who do I call to just converse about life? My fears, my ambitions, my feelings. Who do I call if the only person I want to talk to is you. No one, you shut the door in my face. Out of no where. All these statements and claims with nothing to support them, nothing to help me understand. I end up explaining the course of a conversation and then you change your premise to something else. How on earth am I to keep up and understand if you won't let me? I am confused beyond belief. When I try to speak to you about how I feel you give me an article to read...I'm asking to speak to you, not to google. It's like my mind is caught up in some whirlwind. I don't know what to do, if I'm wanted, if I'm boring, if you care. I do and what's the point of anything. I try not to offend, I try not to cry, I try not to say the wrong thing, but I am imperfect. Stone me for goodness sake. I don't know what to say anymore, but yet I still yearn the sound of your voice. I'm so blatantly shut out and I still yearn the warmth of your arms even if your embrace is cold. Am I a fool if you matter to me? Am I oblivious or am I supposed to just know everything you feel?

I don't know anything anymore, all I know is I want to talk to you.
Unfortunately there is no longer anything to talk about.